Just a Quickie

Just felt like posting a little blog this morning. I'm feeling chatty. And writing something with "quickie" in the title :)

I think I have definitely come to a song decision for my music class and that is "Hold On" from The Secret Garden, which as I mentioned before, is a story that I just love to pieces. It's a song meant for the alto voice, and I'm headed to the library later today to get the sheet music so I can play it on my (digital) piano which always really helps me practice and really hear the notes.

Even though I'm still kind of terrified of singing it in front of my class (I would honestly rather sing in front of lots of people on a stage, because then you're more removed, as opposed to a class where you're seeing the people every day), I'm finally getting into it. And definitely getting an exposure to musical theater I never had before, both through looking for my song, and by other people performing their songs. So far in our class, we've had people singing, "This is the Moment" from Jekyll & Hyde, "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" from Wizard of Oz, "All that Jazz," (don't know what show that's from), "Edelweiss" from the Sound of Music, "Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again" from Phantom of the Opera and "Can You Feel the Love Tonight?" from The Lion King. And through all of that exposure, I'm getting an appreciation.

I think I'm keeping some of the many songs I downloaded and listened to on my computer (Right at this very moment, another song I considered is playing, from Avenue Q, "There's a Fine, Fine Line.") And while I went looking for a movie version of The Secret Garden musical because it's pretty different (I could tell from the soundtrack) from the book, or the original movie based on the book, I found lots of other shows I might consider seeing. I found myself wanting to watch South Pacific again and check out other shows. There apparently is no movie to The Secret Garden musical though. I wanted to find it because our instructor asks people during our song workshops what the context of the song is, which I can mostly get from the soundtrack, and supplemented by finding a description of the musical online.


At least school-wise, I love how my life is kind of split between this challenging science class and music. I feel like I have this left brain/right brain balance that I sometimes have a hard time finding. Especially in school, it has often felt like I'm overdoing one and underdoing the other, but this right now, is working for me. I will have to keep that in mind next year when I will be a full-time student. I am so impatient for that time. I just signed up for spring classes and already I want to see the schedule for next fall, wondering when it will go online (probably sometime in May) and when I can register for a full load of classes. Who knows if I will still be feeling that eager at this point next year, but this year there have been times it has pained me to not sign up for classes that I really wanted to take. There was a Genes and Society class this term that I wanted to be in so badly I almost couldn't help myself. But I had to keep the big picture in mind, and the big picture is I'm trying to get Oregon residency so I can't take over 8 credits and if I had done it, it would have completely jeopardized that. But anyway, in a few months when I do sign up for my full load of classes for next year, I want to keep this balance in mind, and maybe continue to take these 2-credit music classes. I am psyched for piano in the spring term, and have been playing mine more and more recently.

Sometimes though I feel like this weird anomaly of a person who doesn't truly fit in anywhere, and it's frustrating. Sometimes I feel like it's kind of difficult for other people, if they know me one way, to see me in another. I'm a writer, and a lot of people know me in that way. I've met a lot of people in a writing context but then I'm also really into science, and I've met some people in that context, and then I also read tarot cards and do astrology charts and think about metaphysics and the paranormal and the spiritual, and then I'm a sort of atheist. Sometimes I just feel like one huge bundle of contradictions and it can be hard to deal with sometimes but I don't think I'd have it any other way.

With that being said, I am off for a very busy day running errands around town, picking up a field guide and the sheet music, and later today, collecting some plants for my plant press (aka playing in the dirt). And thankfully it's shaping up to be a sunny morning in the Pacific Northwest!


Currently Listening:
"Anna Begins" - Counting Crows - this is probably THE song that got me hooked on them, back in the very late 90s. I have such love for this song. I love when songs tell a story, and this one definitely does. There's a lot of shifting and changing. This just so easily transports me back in time to a time that is so long ago it hardly feels like it was my own life. I cannot overstate how much I love this song. I love all of August & Everything After, but for me, this song makes the album.

My friend assures me, it's all or nothing
I am not worried, I am not overly concerned
My friend implores me, for one time only
Make an exception, I am not worried
Wrap her up in a package of lies
Send her off to a coconut island
I am not worried
I am not overly concerned
With the status of my emotions
Oh, she says, you've changed
We're always changing

It does not bother me to say
This isn't love
Cuz if you don't want talk about it then
It isn't love
And I guess I'm gonna have to live without
But I'm sure there's something in a shade of grey
Or something in between
And I can always change my name if that's what you mean

My friend assures me, it's all or nothing
But I am not really worried
I am not overly concerned
You try to tell yourself
The things you try to tell yourself
To make yourself forget
To make yourself forget
I am not worried

If it's love, she says,
Then we're gonna have to think about the consequences
But she can't stop shaking
And I can't stop touching her

And this time
When kindness falls like rain
It washes her away
And Anna begins to change her mind
The seconds when I'm shaking
Leave me shuddering for days, she says
And I'm not ready for this sort of thing

But I'm not gonna break
And I'm not gonna worry about it anymore
I'm not gonna bend
And I'm not gonna break
I'm not gonna worry about it anymore
No, no, no, it seems like I should say
As long as this is love
But it's not all that easy
So maybe I should
Snap her up in a butterfly net
Pin her down on a photograph album
I am not worried
Cuz I've done this sort of thing before

But then I start to think about the consequences
And I don't get no sleep, in a quiet room

And this time
When kindness falls like rain
It washes me away
And Anna begins to change my mind
And every time she sneezes I believe it's love
And oh lord, I'm not ready for this sort of thing

(Rain falls down)
She's talking in her sleep
(Rain falls down)
It's keeping me awake
(Rain falls down)
And Anna begins to toss and turn
(Rain falls down)
And every word is nonsense but I understand
(Rain falls down)
And oh lord, I'm not ready for this sort of thing

Her kindness bangs a gong
It's moving me along
And Anna begins to fade away
She's chasing me away
She disappears
And oh lord, I'm not ready for this sort of thing